01
SERVER
Windows Server: Because Stability Is Overrated.
Every reboot feels like a personality reset. Uptime? A rumor.
KEEP READING →MICROFUCK / SERVERS
Servers jokes
without the training.
Pick a joke below. Every KEEP READING → button opens a full satirical article in the Microfuck document reader.
02
SERVER
Windows Server 2019 — Now With Extra Downtime.
You asked for better performance. Microsoft gave you more restarting configurations.
KEEP READING →03
SECURITY
Security You Can Trust… Until Next Week's CVE.
A leaky boat is still a boat. Keep patching the holes.
KEEP READING →04
ACTIVE DIRECTORY
Active Directory: The Labyrinth You Never Escape.
One wrong click can break 500 logins and ruin your weekend.
KEEP READING →05
LINUX
Windows Server — For When You Want Linux But Fear Freedom.
Same infrastructure problems, now with a GUI and licensing.
KEEP READING →06
LICENSING
Licensing Hell: More Editions!
Standard, Datacenter, Essentials, or Just-Pay-Us-Anyway Edition.
KEEP READING →07
GUI
The World's Most Expensive File Explorer.
Half the system runs PowerShell anyway, but the GUI is there for emotional support.
KEEP READING →08
AZURE
Windows Server + Azure: Disaster in Stereo.
Why have one allegedly complicated system when you can connect two?
KEEP READING →09
ACTIVE DIRECTORY
Microsoft's Most Successful Documented Mistake.
It works beautifully until someone touches the wrong group policy.
KEEP READING →10
AZURE
They called it a cancer. Now they inject it into every Azure VM.
They called it a cancer. Now they inject it into every Azure VM. 😁
KEEP READING →11
UPDATE
Clause 1: “By installing or using this software, you agree to be bound by the terms of this license.”
Clause 1: “By installing or using this software, you agree to be bound by the terms of this license.” Translation: “You paid for the laptop, but the software still belongs to us.” Clause 2: “We may collect diagnostic and usage data to improve our services.” Translation: “We’ll watch what you do and call it ‘improvement.’” Clause 3: “We may install updates automatically.” Translation: “Your computer is ours whenever we feel like it.” Clause 4: “The software is licensed, not sold.” Translation: “You don’t own Windows; you own a permission slip that can be revoked.” Clause 5: “Microsoft is not responsible for data loss resulting from updates or hardware changes.” Translation: “If we break it, it’s your problem.” Clause 6: “By using Microsoft services, you consent to the transfer of your information.” Translation: “Your privacy now travels business class to our servers.” 😁
KEEP READING →12
AZURE
Microsoft terminates jobs of engineers who protested use of AI products by Israel’s military.
Microsoft terminates jobs of engineers who protested use of AI products by Israel’s military. 🧠💣 “AI for Peace... or Pieces?” Microsoft says it’s “building AI for good.” Apparently, that means good enough to aim at people. 🪓 “Speak Freely — and Lose Your Job” At Microsoft, freedom of speech ends right after “Ctrl + Enter.” Engineers who questioned ethics didn’t get an answer — they got terminated. 🧩 “Artificial Intelligence, Real Consequences” When workers protested using AI for military targeting, Microsoft proved something: Their AI might be artificial, but their hypocrisy is real. 🧨 “Empowering Every Person… to Stay Silent” Microsoft’s slogan says: Empower every person and every organization on the planet to achieve more. Apparently, “more” includes surveillance, censorship, and silence. ⚙️ “The Cloud That Rains Missiles” Who knew Azure had a “strike mode”? When conscience c
KEEP READING →13
AZURE
Microsoft is perhaps the most complicit tech company in Israel’s illegal apartheid regime and ongoing…
Microsoft is perhaps the most complicit tech company in Israel’s illegal apartheid regime and ongoing genocide against 2.3 million Palestinians in Gaza. Microsoft’s complicity in Israel’s apartheid and genocide is well documented, exposing its strong ties to the Israeli military, its collaboration with Israeli government ministries, and its involvement in the Israeli prison system, which is notorious for systematic torture and abuse of Palestinians. Microsoft knowingly provides Israel with technology, including artificial intelligence (AI), that is deployed to facilitate grave human rights violations, war crimes, crimes against humanity (including apartheid), as well as genocide. In light of the International Court of Justice’s legally-binding rulings to prevent Israel’s plausible genocide in Gaza, as well as its July 19 Advisory Opinion affirming Israel’s illegal occupation and aparthei
KEEP READING →14
SERVER
“Windows Server: Because Stability Is Overrated.”
🖥️ “Windows Server: Because Stability Is Overrated.” Every reboot feels like a personality reset. Uptime? That’s just a rumor in the Microsoft ecosystem. 😁
KEEP READING →15
UPDATE
“Patch Tuesday: System Admins’ Weekly Horror Film.”
🔁 “Patch Tuesday: System Admins’ Weekly Horror Film.” Some people look forward to Fridays — sysadmins dread Tuesdays. Nothing says “enterprise-grade” like praying an update won’t nuke your network. 😁
KEEP READING →16
SERVER
💾 “Windows Server 2019 — Now With Extra Downtime!”
💾 “Windows Server 2019 — Now With Extra Downtime!” You asked for better performance. Microsoft gave you more restarting configurations. 😁
KEEP READING →17
SERVER
“Security You Can Trust… Until Next Week’s CVE.”
🔐 “Security You Can Trust… Until Next Week’s CVE.” Windows Server is like a leaky boat — they keep patching the holes, but somehow the water always finds a way in. 😁
KEEP READING →18
ACTIVE DIRECTORY
“Active Directory: The Labyrinth You’ll Never Escape.”
🧠 “Active Directory: The Labyrinth You’ll Never Escape.” The only system where one wrong click can break 500 user logins and ruin your weekend. 😁
KEEP READING →19
SERVER
“Windows Server GUI: The World’s Most Expensive File Explorer.”
⚙️ “Windows Server GUI: The World’s Most Expensive File Explorer.” Half of the system runs PowerShell anyway, but they keep the GUI so you can pretend it’s user-friendly. 😁
KEEP READING →20
AZURE
“Windows Server + Azure: Disaster in Stereo.”
☁️ “Windows Server + Azure: Disaster in Stereo.” Because why have one unreliable system when you can sync two of them? 😁
KEEP READING →21
ACTIVE DIRECTORY
Active Directory: Microsoft’s Most Successful documented Mistake 😁
Active Directory: Microsoft’s Most Successful documented Mistake 😁
KEEP READING →22
AZURE
[ Photo ]
[ Photo ] Azure doesn’t care what it’s powering, a hospital or a drone or army, as long as the invoice gets paid.
KEEP READING →MICROFUCK STATUSAll systems sarcastically operational.
22 long articles